A HAIRY MESS!

DIRECTED BY NATHAN GRENO & BYRON HOWARD

WITH THE VOICES OF MANDY MOORE, ZACHARI LEVI, DONNA MURPHY, BRAD GARRETT, JEFFREY TAMBOR, RICHARD KIEL, M.C. GAINEY, PAUL F. TOMKINS and RON PERLMAN

I do not understand Walt Disney productions’ obsession with fairytales, and this recent offering of theirs called ‘Tangled’ only strengthens/legitimizes my opinion. While its step-sister studio at Pixar so brilliantly crafts every single of its brainchildren to near-perfection, Disney, I felt, has always been muddled with its choices for film production, as is easily observable in the shoddy, mediocre live-action films it springs once in a while (the likes of ‘the Gameplan’, ‘Enchanted’ and so on). ‘Bolt’ was a relief, and I shall not raise a word against the brilliance of its ‘the Princess and the Frog’. ‘Tangled’, to me, did not sound like a wise option to pin the persona of the studio and the founder himself and I gave it a shot to see how much it proved me wrong.

Looks like I’ve won my bet at the expense of a half a billion dollars. That’s how much the film would go ahead to make, I’m sure.

Where do I start? The gimmicks? The actual fall? Believe me, I don’t need the thickset trusses of one Miss Rapunzel to jump out of this tower that would have me elude all sense, namely the movie. I’d take my dive even if it’s a crash than having to survive the wreck otherwise! Here is a film with such wannabe sweetness that it’s repulsive, for a fact. And the stereotypes, such stereotypes! I would be devastated if the makers suggest this to be a ‘tribute’ to the legend of Walt Disney, who enjoyed breathing life into the many tales that lay forgotten in the chasms of tender minds, for it has neither the flair nor the imagination that so made him stand out from Producers of his age. And I speak for the studio as well.

If this music score is from the man who sprung together the extravaganza of ‘the Little Mermaid’, then there can be no higher dishonor than to mention it to him; stir some nostalgia, pray for him to redeem himself from the clutches of modern mediocrity. Mandy Moore as Rapunzel is manslaughter, the voices are dreary, even gruesome. The humour is forced, it’s a kick in the guts if you don’t laugh – I boast of wounds of refusal. I cannot even commend the animation, there has hardly been an effort in that department. Why this film was not sanctioned to be hand-drawn makes me surprised – is that not the rightful tribute in essence? That Disney’s 50th venture is a reversion to its past? Surely one does not need public opinion to take that choice!

To be disappointed is to understate. I have never been this repulsed by an animated venture since ‘Chicken Little’. To say that with this I have failed to view the film through gullible ten year-old eyes is merely an excuse – how many films has this very studio produced masterpieces enjoyable by both children as well as adults before? It so happens that this is not one such, I would advice to not put kids through this either, for this is the fever, not the candy. Just a way to scrape something for the inventory, in a world where people would pretty much watch anything that moves.